Have you ever had one of those days where you had sort of an epiphany and very shortly thereafter you had an epiphany in the opposite direction? This morning was just such a morning. Follow along...

Let me back up a few days first though. I had my "pouchoscopy" and "pouch-o-gram" tests last Friday in preparation for my TakeDown surgery. I haven't officially heard the results, but it sounds like everything was right in line and it's looking like I'll be having the TakeDown surgery either next week or more likely the week after that. One of the nurses though pointed out something I've been hearing a lot lately. He said "You sure have been through a lot for someone so young." Now, I'm not exactly young, and I know there have been many people, kids included, that have been through much more in much less time. Still, I sure feel like it sometimes.

Anyway, I had my appointment with the Oncologist this morning. My surgeon said he didn't think I'd need chemotherapy but wanted me to meet with an oncologist just to make sure. While sitting in the waiting room light bulb one came on. "I seriously need to find myself a good Pediatrician. I'm tired of being the youngest one in the waiting rooms for all these doctor's appointments. Tired of waiting in waiting rooms where the most prominent magazine is 'Senior Living'."

Talking to the nurse that took my vitals, she commented on how my chart was very different from most other patients. My blood pressure is perfect (100/64 today) and the page that lists my currently prescribed medications is blank.

When the doctor came in, he started the conversation with something like "You should send your doctors something really nice for Christmas because they seriously saved your life." He said things are great, I have no cancer and no need for chemotherapy. He went on to explain the stages of colon cancer and where I was in the progression of things. The tumor was about 4 cm, which was bigger than I thought it was, but luckily had not progressed deeper than the innermost layer. He said my surgeon took biopsies from something like 24 lymph nodes right around the cancer and another 26 or so lymph nodes in other locations and ALL came back cancer free. He said that had this been a year or two later, we'd be having a very different discussion. He also said that based on the size it had probably only been there for a year or two. Considering I've had UC for about 20 years and this was all found after my first colonoscopy, to quote my Oncologist "you dodged a bullet with this one!" He ended my discussion by telling the nurse to get me out of there and make room for some sick people.

It was about this time that light bulb one popped and went out and light bulb two came on. "Would you rather be the oldest one in the waiting room? Or would you rather be the healthiest one in the waiting room?" Yeah, I'll take the healthiest any day of the week.

The irony to me in writing this blog is that yesterday I was pissed off because without so much as a warning, they canceled my medical disability because my claim had expired and I was supposed to be back at work. Never mind that the length of time was a very vague estimate and that in all likelihood I'd need more time, they just cut you off and you get to try get things rolling again while you're trying to rest and recover. So now I'm short of money and hoping there won't be any problems with my doctor putting in an extension. There "shouldn't be" any problems, let's hope there aren't. Anyway, I was pissed off because of that and was going to get on here and blog up a storm and I decided I just didn't have the energy to and I hoped the negativity would pass. It'll take a few days for the money situation to work itself out, but regardless, today was a MUCH better day.

-jk